Do you swallow?

Asks the nice man in the kebab shop. Now, forgive me for being so naive, but this is not what I expect from my kebab shop experience. It's bad enough getting abuse for asking if the curry sauce is vegetarian. The answer was yes by the way, that explains why some of it is on my beautiful silk top.

That was yes to the curry sauce by the way. You'll have to know me a lot better before I answer the other one.

It was an odd night. I like 5th ave, it's one of my favourite places to go, but 80p bottles are my downfall I feel, and I think I've had too many of them. I'm working tomorrow, and I have to drive there. I will drink water, I promise.

But I pulled a nice boy who went by the name of Nick. He asked me back to his place in Salford. Then he made the mistake of accusing me of being a Man Met student. They don't do Medicine at Man Met my love, you just lost yourself a good night.

I have a date next week that I'm quite happy about. It is silly really as I've been messed about by this man a fair bit, I'm sure I've mentioned it before. But as I say, I'm excited, even if everyone else thinks I'm crazy. Sod it. Hope it goes well.

Oh bloody hell work is sooner than I thought.

I'll leave you with a beautiful quiz from The Mint (or whatever ITV call their Quiz Call thingymabob)

Double....

They already have double act, double bed, double cream and double take.

We're going with double entendre. This could be above their usual viewing audience's intellect.

Results

Got up early. I would say 'so I could let the 'builders' in' but in reality it was because I'd not realised my alarm clock was still set from Saturday, the last time I was in my bed. It was just a happy coincidence that they didn't have to wake me up when they arrived.

Then again, they didn't arrive til about 2pm. Wonder if Landlord knows what slackers he's employed?

They were perplexed to discover I'd locked the side gate with a new lock, and came to the front door to question this. I told them off. At first they denied leaving the gate unlocked. 'Not us love' all around, and my particular favourite 'Ask your housemate, she was in when we left'. No, she flew home 2 days ago. Eventually they discovered that the youngest, quietest member of the group was the culprit, and the oldest and largest offered to 'bollock him' for me. They asked me to change the lock back. Not a chance. 'I obviously can't trust you...' I said in my most disappointed mother-like voice.

Fifteen minutes later the one with the best English came in and gave me a full, lengthy, sincere apology and offered to bring me 'some smokes' on Monday. Although I assured him that wouldn't be necessary, I'm glad he recognised quite how annoyed they had made me.

When they left (an hour later, it had started to rain) all six of them stood looking at the floor apologising again as I looked down from the doorway. I felt like I was telling off small children.

I think they've learned their lesson.

Oh, I passed. Second year (and pre-clinical) medicine is over. Bit of an anti-climax if I'm honest. Perhaps because they're the worst marks I've had so far. I mean, a pass is a pass... it just made me realise that I've wallowed a little too much in self pity this year, and put too much emphasis on partying. Hopefully I'll make up for it next year- I know I should be in the first quartile and as it counts from September, I'd best start acting like it.

Fun fun fun

Had a great couple of days. Went to London, got drunk, generally good fun. Even if my friend's 31 yr old brother (with fiance and small child) came on to me. Otherwise an excellent time.

Car went for it's MOT. Failed. Costing £400. But it's fine, I kinda expected it. Get it back tomorrow.

Came back to Manchester today to find 'builders' in my back garden. Damn. Had forgotten about them. Ah well, I thought, Landlord said they'd not bother me, he gave them a key to the side gate so they could get to the garden without bothering me. Turns out he'd also given them a back door key. I walked in the house to find them strolling in and out my kitchen. Ignore it, I thought, ring Landlord when there's more time to moan about it, but for now, ignore it. Went out to work.

Came back from work at 9pm. Side gate wide open. Back door wide open. Assume 'builders' left before 5. That's 4hrs of my house being entirely open to the public. I live in the ghetto. My laptop was in the living room. I was very thankful it was still there.

I have called the Landlord and *ahem* expressed my disgust. I have also replaced the lock on the gate for one only I have a key for, so 'builders' must ring the doorbell and speak to me on arrival tomorrow. I will be screaming my fucking lungs out to them too. How dare they leave my house like that?!

Also, exam results tomorrow. Argh.

That will be all.

Why girls can't drive.

So, I finally gave up having a strop at the DVLA website and decided to go pay my car tax in person. Paperwork-wise I was worried, as I thought my MOT was due July 1st, the day the tax disc starts, so I didn't know if they'd let me have it before getting the new one done. Rummaged through to find the certificate.

It doesn't expire July 1st. It expired May 1st.

Oops.

To Do List

Seeing as exams are over, and I'm having a rare night in, I thought I'd write my to-do list for the rest of my time in Manchester. And as I've packed up most of my stationery, I thought I'd do it online rather than on paper. Here goes:

1. Write to new landlord about arrangements for picking up keys, getting doorbell fixed, bringing extra furniture and being given a copy of the contract. Ought to have had one several months ago, so am worried that he's decided against letting us move in after all. I will cry if we don't get that flat, after all we went through... bring on July 1st (moving day!).
2. Pack up stuff. Bearing in mind that housemate-with-no-stuff managed to fill a car, I am worried this will take me some time. I am a serial hoarder, a serial shopper and I've taken over the living room as well as the kitchen and my room. I calculated earlier that my crap littering the living room is worth more than £1000. Which brings me on to...
3. Sort out contents insurance. I think a year's worth of good luck is probably all I'm gonna have.
4. Go into mobile phone shop and get new contract. Have been ignoring O2's mistakes for too long and I think it's time I was spending less than £45/month. Plus my phone is playing a mix-and-match game with all incoming texts, meaning it'll pick a random name out my phone book, tell me it's from them, and take the first half of one message and the second half of another and put them as one continuous text. Confuses the hell out of me.
5. Clean my car. Which will mean coming face to face with Freddy the spider that lives in my wing mirror, and Freddy Two on the boot. I hate spiders. Might pay my brother to do it at the weekend.
6. Book my MOT, and find a nice boy to come with me so as not to get ripped off by them charging me for the inevitable things that need fixing.
7. Pay my car tax, if the bloody DVLA will let me.
8. Take vaccination history to nursing agency so I can finally get my training done so I can actually start working sometime soon.
9. Pre-order Harry Potter from [generic online bookstore] so it can be delivered to me at summer school. Yes I am that sad. And that much of a traitor to a certain highstreet bookstore/newsagent/stationers that employed me for many a year. It's cheaper online.
10. Book doctors appointment so can be shouted at for not taking my iron, but be given some more, hopefully that tastes better.

This should keep me busy. However, I know full well that I'll do this instead:

1. Sleep until lunchtime
2. Watch Loose Women
3. Go on facebook
4. Go out and drink too much
5. Spend most of the next day feeling hungover
6. Occasionally manage to make it in for a shift with Students and Schools, only for wages not to cover the amount I spent on vodka the night before.
7. Have complete mad panic day before moving day and throw all possessions into bin bags which split whilst being carried upstairs to new flat.

Sigh.

Hungover ramblings

I'm hungover.

Since the exams finished, it's how I've spent an awful lot of my time. I've been out drinking 8 of the past 10 nights, and I think today it's all hit me at once. I didn't get up til 1pm, and it's now 3.30 and I'm still not dressed. I'm eating a jacket potato, a huge chunk of halloumi and a chilli. Yes, a whole chilli, I couldn't be bothered to wash up a knife to cut it up and make something exciting with it, so I just threw it under the grill with the halloumi and I'm eating it like a piece of fruit. Thankfully my mouth is numb from drinking ridiculous amounts of paintstripper vodka and breathing in nothing but secondhand smoke all week.

Much as I've enjoyed my post-exams fun, there have been a fair few annoyances too. Landlord has been as irritating as ever, though we've got him back by hiding and pretending nobody's in when he's come round for rent (despite there being 3 cars on the drive), refusing him entry when he's turned up unannounced, and finally facing up to him and telling him that we're not paying this month's rent as we don't think he'll give us our deposit back. Eventually he accepted this, and told us to 'leave the house as clean as it was when we moved in'. I'm working on the fridge mould as we speak.

Our neighbours on both sides have started noisy DIY. They're doing it in shifts, one taking early mornings and the other evenings and weekends. I wouldn't mind, but it clashes with my new nocturnal sleeping habits, and drilling doesn't help a hangover. What makes it even worse though, is that both sides give us dirty looks as we walk past, as if we're the awful neighbours. We're always quiet when we get in at 4am, and we've never had loud parties or caused any trouble. All we've done is left the grass to grow to shoulder height. But Landlord said he'd sort that!

My big moan though is the fabulous DVLA, who sent me a nice reminder that my car tax is due (joy) and a flyer advertising the benefits of using their new quick online system. After spending 20 minutes waiting for the bloody page to load, I was told that the reference number I've been given is wrong, and so I'll have to do it in person anyway. Useless waste of my time.