Feedback

At the end of every attachment we do we're supposed to have a feedback meeting with our tutor, and they tick and sign our sheets. There's room for comments. Most of the time they bother to write a few words, and ask us how we feel we're doing. That's about it.

This time my tutor did it properly. Individual meetings, discussion of our strengths and weaknesses. I'm really glad he did. Its rare on our course to be told how well you're doing compared to everyone else, and getting one-on-one time is almost unheard of.

He was very complimentary. I don't think I've ever had anyone be so nice. He told me that he thinks I'd be a great GP before I even told him that's what I'm leaning towards. He said that if I were to become a GP he'd want me to be his, as my smile and positive professional persona would make him feel better just by being in the same room. He filled in my feedback form with the words 'outstanding student' at the top.

I didn't really know how to take it to be honest. I assumed he was just a gushy kind of guy, but having seen the face of a very intelligent colleague who came out just before me I don't think he was as nice to everyone. I don't really know how I managed to deserve it.

I did have a moment of over-analysing, and got upset by the fact that I never get told my knowledge is strong, only my caring side. I often think I feel more comfortable as a home carer than a medical student, although I couldn't live comfortably on the income! I'm too lazy to do the reading, I seem to think I'll absorb what I need to know by turning up to seminars and sticking needles in people occasionally. So far it's working, but I doubt I'll get away with it for much longer. I don't really want to if I'm honest. Yet I've not had that kick up the arse moment yet. I'd half hoped he'd tell me I'm a slacker and to pull my finger out. Now I just know I can slack off for longer. Sigh.

Then I thought maybe he'd analysed me and realised I'm insecure, and that's why he was so nice to me. I need reassurance more than most.

Then I thought that I should just stop thinking about it and take the compliment. On my Mum's advice. She was very proud!